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You Belong; You Are Loved

Updated: Aug 19, 2023

I am genuinely seeking to help folks who are weary of struggling with depression, anxiety, coping with feelings of unworthiness, chronic pain or fatigue, who have been ADOPTED. If you are looking for a complimentary, new method to help cope with the stressors of life that is affordable, please reach out.


First, understand, I am adopted and I intimately understand the myriad feelings adoptees might experience. This is not , of course , to imply that every adoptee has the identical feelings or experience. But for those who struggle with feelings of less than, unworthiness , unlovable, sadness and fearfulness, I want to encourage and inspire you that Life is Good and You Are Lovable!


I am a lifelong seeker of peace and wellbeing , who while in my 20's started looking for a means to help with childhood issues and a feeling of unworthiness, unlovable. At times I felt like an alien in my own adopted family. Trying to find solace and answers , I began two things : therapy and yoga. Through yoga I found the doorway to meditation . Through meditation I discovered mindfulness. Inadvertently through cognitive therapy I discovered somatic therapy.


Eventually while in my early 30's I was serendipitously lead to study to become a yoga and meditation teacher. Now, at nearly 60 years old, I have discovered that I was not alone in my feelings of unworthiness, unlovable, anxiety and depression… some of which was rooted in my adoption. I can already hear the backlash of those threatened by what I am sharing. So for a moment let's be honest, even the most perfect adoption...still leaves a residue from the original separation called 'the primal wound,' by author Nancy Newton Verrier, of the book by the same title.


Although at times I still struggle with the depressive thoughts, the encouraging news is that over the nearly four decades of studying, searching, and experimenting, I discovered a key to a world beyond my label as 'adopted.' Through somatic (body-mind ) therapy, body dialoging, positive affirmation, breathwork , reframing, specialized yoga for trauma survivors and mindfulness in the Thich Nhat Hanh tradition, I changed the trajectory of my life from one that could easily have ended in suicide, self-destruction and unhappiness to one of feeling like I am living my purpose. I want anyone who is adopted and feeling less than to be encouraged and empowered and know they are loved, lovable and worthy of all the goodness life has to offer !


I have learned that I am the master of my thoughts in so I am free. Studying hypnosis four years ago cemented the deal in my mind that our thoughts and how we perceive them is key. I can retrain my subconscious to see, feel and reframe my story. I learned that the brain could be remolded through the miracle of neuroplasticity. The mindfulness , which yoga engenders, is the perfect antidote to the dissociation often seen in folks who've experienced trauma. In addition it can dampen the hypervigilance and transform that unease into pleasant mindfulness. Through somatic practice I learned there is a pathway to release the physiological strangle hold of past trauma's and losses held in the cellular memory. Thank you Dr. Peter Levine and Dr. Bessel Van der Kolk for your pioneering work in the field of trauma release.


And if someone tells you that your feelings about adoption are not valid because ‘You were chosen. You were picked. You were loved. You were only a baby. . . But you were only a month old . . . ,’ ~What they do not understand is that you were separated from your birth mother, and that is traumatic. That any mother who was put in the position to have to give up her child experienced a flood of fear while pregnant with you. That flood of stress hormones, etc. is what you bathed in for 9 months. To think that stress does not effect the baby in utero, who then becomes an infant newborn, is outdated logic.


The loving-kindness, modification and forgiving practice of non-competitive yoga is perfect to quell the inner voice that may insist, ‘I am not loveable or good enough. ‘

Meditation creates new neural pathways to a calmer state and triggers the prefrontal cortex rather than putting the Amygdala on over-ride. Before this awareness, I never understood why I always felt like I was in a state of emergency as a young adult. Now , I totally get it. My body was triggered into what is called the sympathetic mode so often (the fight-flight-freeze reaction in the autonomic nervous system), it became my MO. But that can be changed with a combination of modalities I've mentioned above.


Because I have been living this, and because I have experimented and seen that these practices are non-invasive and work, I uniquely offer them to my students through my method of teaching.My vision is to form a class series at my Meditation and Yoga Studio, Greenleaf Yoga in St. Charles, which deals with enriching the lives of anyone who is feeling less than, feeling stressed, depressed, suffering with the feeling of not belonging.

I know my life purpose is to help folks live richer, happier, more prosperous lives being helped through the methods I have studied and come to rely on as my go-to. This is in the planning stages, so I would love your input and participation.


I am a certified trauma sensitive yoga teacher, from the Trauma Center at Justice Resource and a certified yoga & meditation teacher from the Himalayan Institute for over 25 years, I hold my bachelors degree in Creative Writing from Columbia College, Chicago, I am also certified by LifeForce Yoga in Yoga for Mood Management by Amy Weintraub , a certified Consulting Hypnotist, and a recent Unity Prayer Chaplain.

BUT, most of all ,I am a life-long seeker of Truth, Peace and Harmony. Please, reach out to me at Pam@Greenleafyogastudio.com or message me . I genuinely care and am here to help. 630-917-9171


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