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Mama: A Long Time Coming

May 10, 2017 by Administrator 48 Comments

There have been many an idea percolating in this gal’s head. Many I’ve thought would make interesting blog topics, brilliant stories, “Ah ha,” Oprah moment stories . . . you know, the kind where the light bulb goes off in sea of mental pause. For years, I’ve been yearning to return to writing, taking the musings of my mind and reflections about life down on paper and monitor (so be it), and share them with the big wide world out there! On the inauguration of the Greenleaf Yoga Blog, a reverence comes over me and a warmth to my heart as I think of my long-gone mom and dad, Agnes and Richard Kuzelka who would be very pleased that their daughter’s college education in writing and journalism wasn’t wasted as a hippie yoga teacher. It’s been a long time coming since I left the writing profession, as a “journalist,” some 20 years ago. Note the insecurity in even the “quotes,” I cautiously place around the word journalist. I guess I never thought of myself as a “real journalist,” maybe because I was small potatoes, a stay-at home mom, working from home at a local newspapers, writing feature stories in between wiping my children’s tears, driving them to soccer games, playing sandlot baseball and being the Art Mom at school. The last professional gig I had was as a local, weekly columnist for the Daily Herald, just two years before I changed the trajectory of my life to embraced my vocation as a meditation and yoga teacher.

This is where blogging comes into play: I’ve been talking about blogging for the last couple of years, before I even knew what the idea entailed! It sounded confusing, full of perplexing cyber maneuverings like Search Engine Optimization, key words and hashtags. But my business mentor, friend, and confidant, constantly reassures me that I can do this (this meaning: run a business, and support myself, solo, after 27 years or marriage).

“No,” he reassures, me, having said these same words dozens of times over the last five years, “you will not live under a bridge when you retire!”

He is confident blogging is my missing link to success, and everything he’s been hearing in the biz marketing world. Blogging is the gap between mediocrity and success as an entrepreneur. Blog, blog, blog, I heard a marketing PR guy belch out this very last weekend…Who knew when I started teaching yoga that it was a commodity that had to be sold? That I not only had to be a compassionate, verbally gifted, kinesthetically attuned, know my yoga philosophy and asana, but also know how to market?

If I were just running the business; teaching classes; simply getting accustomed to living alone; supporting myself, and venturing out to start a foray in writing, that would be a bucket-full! But I’m not! Last May, I drew a metaphoric line in the sand, and decided it was time to face my ultimate fear, stop puttering around talking about wanting to find my birth mother and just do it! So after 52 years of separation, I found my mom . . . she was ready to be found, and I was ready to look, one last time. Turns out she was in the same house in Chicago for 50 years, only to move away 14 years ago and return just less than three. The magnitude of change this year has been grand. After over 33 years of wondering, wishing and searching from the time I was 19 years old dissolved the day I met her last June 29th. But in all the scenarios in my fertile imagination, somehow I never pictured I would have a brother just 15 months younger, who happened to live 15 minutes from my house. So between juggling responsibilities of teaching yoga , meditation, running my own studio and all the minutia that goes with it, I got the family I had hoped and wished for. It’s just that my new mommy is 69 years old and my baby brother is 52! I love ’em all. I am looking forward to celebrating our reunion as mother and daughter, and our first Mother’s Day together! Stay Posted . . .


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